2016, Its Been Real.

All too real in fact. The conundrum that has been the past year really shook me, my secure stepping stone I was once firmly placed on is drifting, and it’s time to jump to a new stone before there’s too much distance and I can’t jump at all.

So I am writing this well in advance of the end of the year to account all my ups and downs of this somewhat hectic year.

Starting on something which has left me in a perturbed state that I’m yet to work out whether its fear or excitement. But as of June 2016, I finished my A levels, and my schooling years. And although I only did 2 A levels, and came out with, lets say, okay grades, I’m proud. You see in my first year of A levels, I came down with a dose of CFS/ME. I’ll save you the sobs stories but it was a tough 2 years, having teachers emailing me discussing whether I should stay in their class because I’d missed so much, and thinking such things myself. I did it. Okay I ditched 2 subjects, but I did it, and came out with 2 A levels. Take that ME. But I have always felt so secure with school, with routine, the same old same old. And now I don’t have that. I love it and hate it. I can do what I want, making life in my head a much happier place, but the next day is always a black abyss and I always question myself, what next?

I turned 18 in July, nothing really changed, I could just buy alcohol, go out, pay taxes – all that fun stuff. But my best friend and I did have the best 18th with all our friends and it was lovely. It wasn’t particularly momentous, it was just turning 18, but it is a milestone that ‘step into adulthood’ ‘next chapter of my life’ stage.

My gap year adventures began. Less travelling than I hoped but that doesn’t mean I’m not wasting my year. I mean, I started this little blog, which has become my pride and sometimes my oxygen I feel. Saying goodbye to friends was hard, but we’re all saying hello to new chapters in our lives which is what matters. I feel at one with myself once again, I’m doing things for me, not because a teacher has told me to. And I love it.

Dare I say this word, but politics. Now I’ve never been one for politics, I choose to shut myself off from politics. Having lived right around the corner from Mr. Cameron himself it was always very monotonous in my head. But two major political affairs have turned the tables to the world and I’ve realised, I need to learn, I need to know, I need to speak out. I won’t drag this talk too long because I know it’s probably giving you all a headache. But one of the most cardinal things happened to our country, something that could change my future, and I was 2 months off the voting age. And it’s just not okay. I’ve learnt that I need to educate myself so I can help the movement of the world, as although being only a small percentage, I’m still a percentage.

I also failed my driving test this year, there’s no moral from that story apart from the fact I suck at driving.

I can happily say the rest will be positive things don’t loose hope in me just yet.

Beginning of September my mum’s car broke down and was then in the garage for the next 9 weeks. And living in the middle of nowhere I was very much stuck at home. 2 great things came out this imprisonment.

Firstly I got my fitness game back. I started working out again and getting fit, and the results were coming in, I felt so much better, I felt like the old me again (take that ME.).

And secondly, EmilyyBecca. This little blog which I neglected to make content on was brought back to life in September, and has since, in my eyes, flourished. I couldn’t be happier. I was always scared of people finding out, but now I’ve told so many people and I honestly don’t mind if people find out. Because if they were to hate, so be it, I don’t see them going to London to meet the most amazing and lovely people who I can happily call my friends, nor do I see them being asked to promote things and be a part of campaigns. God I feel so empowered right now. Alas updating this section a month or so later of originally writing the draft. A downside which I wish to address. I am so honoured and heart warmed when someone approaches me for advice, blogging advice particularly. But I do not condone asking for how I have done something then flat out copy my blog post, with no permission and no recognition. I’ve had people do inspired posts from mine before, and they have mentioned me within it which is always fine and quite flattering. But I made it my own, I added my style, my own voice, and that was taken from me, and I was upset. But c’est la vie. It was a reality hit for me, these things happen and one just has to get up and keep going.

But I’ve had the chance to go to make so many amazing friends and connect with amazing people, and even meet them! I’ve been able to express myself, love myself, support others, watch myself and others grow. Sounds soppy but is so true. And however far this blog goes, whether it stops and dies next week or goes on for years, I’m so glad to have this time.

What a year, writing the dot on old chapters, writing the opening sentences of a new one, passing, failing, changing, forgetting, kicking chronic illness’ ass, loving, despising, fighting, understanding, wondering, wandering, uniting, meeting, befriending, exploring, learning.

2016, major mic drop.

 

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40 comments so far.

40 responses to “2016, Its Been Real.”

  1. Sophie says:

    I’ve only recently discovered your blog, but it looks like you had one roller coaster of a year. I wish you all the best for 2017 and the new adventures its sure to bring xx

    Sophie’s Spot

  2. You’ve certainly had a roller coaster year, I hope you have a great 2017 and enjoy your gap year!

  3. nushablog says:

    Great post ! I’m glad you started blogging as you’re doing great 😄

  4. Tiffany says:

    This is such a great post, I loved reading it. Well done on getting your A levels after such a tough few years! That’s an amazing achievement! Good luck with everything for 2017! 🙂

    Tiffany x http://www.foodandotherloves.co.uk

  5. I love reading your post and I love how honest you are! Keep up the great work – http://www.teaisawishyourheartmakes.wordpress.com

  6. RealNess says:

    Bring on 2017! X

  7. Emily says:

    Congrats on your A-levels and all of your blog achievements! And it’s encouraging to hear that everything that’s happened in the world has gotten you more interested in politics. It’s so important that people who will be affected by their country’s decisions take part in making those decisions!

    Here’s to 2017!

    Xoxo
    Emily
    emilyhallock.blogspot.com

  8. This is just such a cute post. I love the fact that you’ve summarised the whole year without being too long or too short. I honestly wish I could write like you!! This is such a lovely post (so nice I’ve said it twice!!).
    I can’t wait to see what 2017 holds for you and your blog xxx
    http://www.lifeinkateish.wordpress.com

    • Em says:

      Aww thank you so so much, this comment has made my day! Gal your writing is amazing don’t be silly! Thank you, I can’t wait to see what holds in store for you too lovely xxx

  9. pinkiebag says:

    Well done on the a levels and the blog a great achievement. I look forward to reading your future posts, Chloe https://pinkiebag.com/

  10. CrisAbbigail says:

    It’s crazy how when your one year older you don’t feel the difference. Great post.

  11. I am so proud of everything you have achieved Em. I only got 2 A Levels due to a rough time as well, but reading this just proves to me once again how amazing and strong you are!
    Your achievements with you blog have been wonderful to see, I mean hello 300 followers right?! You are a star!
    Keep smiling, keep being strong, and just keep being you!
    Hope 2017 is a fantastic year for you. Love you gal x

    • Em says:

      Oh my gosh gal I love you so so much😭 you beautiful human thank you!! And I’m equally so so proud of you and everything you’ve achieved!! Have the best 2017 love ya x

  12. Have a wonderful 2017 – hope to see you again!

  13. Hello! I just discovered your blog today! I have been going through your posts and I never Want to leave! As a new blogger Your writing and blog inspires me to work harder and continue to work on it. Cant wait to read more! Following immediatly x https://chiarascornersite.wordpress.com

    • Em says:

      Oh my gosh thank you so so much! This means the world to me, and I’m so glad you feel inspired, all the best in the blogosphere! x

  14. possiblysami says:

    It sure does sound like a heck of a year but look at you now. Tomorrow is always a new day to improve and will be better! I loved reading this post, it somewhat made me feel better knowing that even if something doesn’t go right, it’s okay! love u!

    sami xx

  15. CONNXVI says:

    you’ll pass your driving test in no time, you just gotta keep trying and stay determined! loved this post emily! happy new year!

  16. Proud of you completing those A levels! & I failed my driving test first time but you just have to keep trying 🤗 Get an early test next time because they statistically pass more people in the morning apparently!

    I hope this year is full of love and happiness for you x

    THE ETHICAL EVOLUTION – CRUELTY FREE / ETHICAL / VEGAN
    https://theethicalevolution.wordpress.com/

    • Em says:

      Thank you! Exactly, over half fail first time so there’s nothing to worry about! No way really?? That’s so weird omg! Thank you so much, you too! x

  17. Aliyah says:

    So unbelievably proud of you! As always a beautiful post! Wish you the best of luck and love for 2017 and I can’t wait to see what you bring this year! All my love ❤️

    • Em says:

      Aww gal thank you so much! This means the world, and all the best for the year to come lovely, much love! xox

  18. Hey Emilyyy! Sounds like you’ve had a crazy & awesome 2016 :)) Love that you got back into fitness & came back to blogging. I started mine in October & it’s been a really great & fun learning experience. If you wanna join my plank challenge coming up soon, then you’re def invited :)) It’s more for people who are inactive to get into a more fitness lifestyle & there’s def a focus on core strength. Hope all your dreams for 2017 come true!

    • Em says:

      It’s certainly been a concoction of feelings! Thank you! Ahh no way, I’m so glad you’re enjoying it! Ahh that sounds awesome! Thank you so much you too! x

  19. What a lovely post, and blog! I hope 2017 is an amazing year for you! x
    // https://lifeaslaublog.wordpress.com

  20. Wow just discovered your blog! Absolutely love it 😄
    Patrick a.k.a fairlyhopelesswanderings.wordpress.com

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