A REINTRODUCTION: WHO DO I WANT TO BE ONLINE?

When you have some form of online presence, whatever that may be, you get asked the inevitable: “How would you describe your audience?“. For some, that’s simple.

“Students wanting to eat well on a budget” or “Parents who’d much rather be drinking merlot in front of the telly, but somehow need to workout how to get that ominous stain out the carpet.”

Myself? I’m stumped. The word niche is constantly thrown around the blogging realm with great importance. I even wrote a post many moons ago about whether you should be branding yourself as a blogger. And, I’m not entirely sure what made me feel like I had a position to tell you how to brand yourself. When the nearest thing to a ‘brand’ I get to is making weird puns and saying I’m going to post more on Instagram, but never do…

So, who do I want to be online? Something that’s been rattling through my brain recently. I love the freedom the internet gives you, to paint yourself in any light. The light that allows you to convey yourself however you want, without limitations. Unless you’re Phil, 45 from Hackney pretending to be 16 year old Georgia. Not that kind of light. So, how to I want to be perceived? I got lost the more I thought about it. I’ve always described my audience, and my blog, as a reflection of me. A wandering and wondering 20 year old who likes clothes and pretty pictures. But it’s also got me thinking about my intentions, and what it is I want for my blog in the future.

But let’s start at the beginning, shall we?

I’m Emily, Em, whatever you want to call me. Just not Emma pls. I’m 20 (however often mistaken for a 14 year old), and coming in at a whopping 5’3. I’m very much of a petite gal, with a body that can’t seem to make up what size it is. Sometimes a 6, sometimes a 4, other times an 8. Let’s just say online shopping is a risky game for me. And even with a bit of fake tan I’m as pale as they come, and go a nice shade of home grown tomatoes in the summer months.

I was born and bred in the Cotswold countryside near Oxford. My time spent playing man-hunt around the mile radius of our village, going to pony club and Scout meetings and then getting pissed on cheap cider by the river as we got older. I was a quiet child who got her head down and cracked on at school. Had a comfortable group of friends and just slipped in and out of the hallways minding my own business.

I was a very musical child, and that hasn’t changed. I love music in all it’s wonderful forms. Throughout my years I’ve played 4 instruments (5 if you count the recorder in year 2), not all have been successful, however. I also learnt to sing from the age of 9-ish, and have been doing it ever since. Which I guess is where my love for musical theatre stemmed from. So, after my gap year, I packed my bags and headed off to pursue my dream at drama school. Which is what I thought would be the case until I got 6 months through and a knee injury and illness had me heading right back home again to focus on other things for the time being.

Which kind of brings me to where I am now. 20 going on 21. Still very young, but definitely acting a lot older than I am. And still no plans to head back to uni anytime soon. I’m living at home with the same pink drawers I’ve has since I was 8. And panning out ~what’s next~ for me. I currently work as an assistant for an NHS Trust, whilst trying to build a freelance photography career. I love photography, I’ve always had some sort of camera in my hand and I love to capture moments. And since starting my blog in 2016 I’ve grown to love it even more, and decided I wanted to do more with it.

So now, who do I want to be? What do I want to create, and for what purpose?

There’s a lot I want to talk about on my blog. I want to scrap Yoast with it’s gloating red traffic light which narks me for starters. And delve more into my 20 year old thoughts on careers, relationships, feminism, money, feeling like absolute crap and the world is against you and that constant battle of wanting a house and a dog, but also wanting to leave on a plane and not return for at least 6 months. Follow my early twenties in a collection of waffle. But, at the same time I also want to talk about what I got up to this week ft. some great banana bread from the cafe down the road, skincare for sensitive skin, how to make a great espresso martini and wear some nice outfits in between all of that.

But I also want to be unapologetically creative with it. I want to bring my inspiration to life, whether that be through photography or through making an aesthetically pleasing moodboard to inspire others. I also want to try new mediums and concepts, experiment with my ideas without any limitations or need for justification. So, in a nut-shell, I want to be a walking talking Pinterest board. But what’s so wrong with that?

So yeah, with my small frame and Cotswolds backdrop, I could quite easily slip into your classic blogger type. But, all the same, I’ve sat in the footwell of my friends car crying countless times because I had too much Lidl rose, and had cheesecake for breakfast because I’m almost too average of a 20 year old. But maybe that’s who I want to be, my online self is an average early twenties gal talking about average early twenty-year-old gal things, whilst making some cool visuals and wearing some nice clothes along the way.

E x